The silent cost of borrowed beliefs
In a world that rewards speed, efficiency, and external validation, how many of us have truly examined what we stand for?
Many professionals believe they have strong values, yet when questioned, they refer to inherited rules, workplace norms, or societal expectations. They mistake boundaries for beliefs, rules for values. But values are not simply about what you won’t do - they are the foundation of who you are.
Borrowed Beliefs: The Easy Path
Borrowed beliefs offer structure, certainty, and social acceptance. They provide a script to follow - one that keeps us moving forward with minimal resistance. But they are also very fragile. When tested, they crumble, leaving behind confusion and a crisis of identity.
Your true values, on the other hand, are forged. They emerge through questioning, reflection, and experience. They do not shift with trends or external pressures; they are the compass that keeps us anchored when everything else is uncertain.
Why This Matters in the Age of AI
AI is designed for optimization. It streamlines, automates, and refines, removing friction wherever possible. And in doing so, it takes advantage of our human tendency toward the path of least resistance, rewarding speed over reflection, convenience over complexity, and external validation over internal conviction.
In our pursuit of efficiency, achievement, and recognition, we are not just choosing to ignore this AI risk, we are allowing it to chip away at our identity. We let algorithms dictate our choices, reinforce our biases, and subtly shape who we become. But without consciously defining our values, we risk being led, rather than leading.
And when the day of reckoning comes, when AI automates the very tasks we built our careers around, many will find themselves adrift, asking, What am I good at? What brings me joy? And why am I here? Those who never paused to reflect will experience this awakening as abrupt, painful, and unexpected. Self-reflection is not a luxury; it is prophylactic, ie. the work we do now to ensure we are prepared for what’s ahead.
The Weight of Choice
Values require active choice. In every decision - big or small - we are either reinforcing what we stand for or eroding it. And while borrowed beliefs may get us further, faster, they do so at the cost of something far greater: clarity, purpose, and self-definition.
Many professionals don’t realize they are following institutional values, not personal ones. They equate “being a team player” with agreeing to everything, “being ambitious’” with overworking, and “being strategic” with playing politics. The real question isn’t just What do I believe? but Who benefits from me believing this? If your belief serves a system more than it serves you, is it truly yours?
A Call to Reflection
The antidote to borrowed beliefs is intentional reflection. Ask yourself: Are my values truly my own, or have I simply inherited them from my environment? What choices have I made that reflect those values? Where have I compromised them for the sake of convenience or approval?
To take this further, think of 3 major decisions you’ve made in your professional life. Were they guided by deeply held values, or influenced by external pressures? Maybe it was a financial decision that challenged your integrity, a moment where staying silent felt easier than speaking up, or a career move driven more by recognition than conviction. Whatever they are, examine them honestly.
For those looking to go deeper, I recommend:
Viktor E. Frankl’s Man’s Search for Meaning – A powerful exploration of how meaning, not success, is the foundation of a fulfilled life.
Dr. Sunita Sah’s Defy – A sharp look at how we conform to authority and influence without realizing it and how to break free.
In the end, we are not defined by what we say we value, but by the principles we uphold when it matters most.
